What to do When Living Abroad Gets Hard

Regardless of what you thought before moving overseas, if you’ve been an expat for any amount of time you know it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. You are building a life in a whole new culture so you’re bound to feel down from time to time. While it’s perfectly normal to feel this way, today I want to give you some ways I try to get out of a funk when expat life has taken a toll on my mental health.

Rather watch me give these tips? Watch the YouTube video here —>

As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. This post contains affiliate links at no extra charge to you. I only feature products that I believe in and use myself.

Take One Day at a Time

I know, this one is easier said than done. But that doesn’t make it any less true. Are you thinking about all the things you need to do? Or if you’re like me you think a lot about the future. Since we are company expats, I tend to think too much about what the next assignment will be - where, how and when. Perhaps you left a great city or job back home for expat life and you’ve found yourself living in the past - reminiscing too much about your “past life” and wishing you were still there. I’ve been in this trap too. I left my dream job for Angola and I missed working a lot when I suddenly found myself “just” a stay-at-home wife. 

To take one day at a time, I like to wake up each morning and think of one thing I can accomplish that day. I know it sounds small, but when you complete the task for that day you will feel accomplished, no matter what mood you’re in. I’ve used the trick many times as an expat. Some of the things I’ve focused on have included learning a new tense in Spanish, cooking a new recipe, cleaning out my closet, color coordinating my bookshelf, going to the grocery store, organizing the photos on my computer and practicing curling my hair. Yeah, some of these are bigger deals than others but no matter the size of the task, it really helps so much to go to sleep feeling like you accomplished a goal you set for yourself that day.

Exercise

If you’re in your head too much, this is super important to help relieve stress. I’m a runner, so jogging is like therapy to me. I’ve noticed I have to jog a few times a week or I start getting anxious. I could never see the difference before coronavirus and the quarantine. Here in Argentina, we could not exercise outside for 90 days. Getting through that time without running outside was difficult but I was able to substitute in YouTube workout to keep my body moving. Showing yourself what your body can do each day - whether it’s holding a 1 minute plank, jumping on a trampoline for 10 minutes or lifting weights - will make you feel mentally and physically stronger. 

And you don’t need full on cardio to get the benefits. I notice when I take my pups on their afternoon walk there’s a huge difference in my attitude and mindset after the walk. There’s a reason everyone says to go on a walk if you’re feeling down - because it actually works. 

Eat Foods from Home

I’m not advocating eating your emotions here. But I have noticed nothing is quite as comforting when you’re living overseas as a meal from home. Now obviously you can’t have your mom ship you a home-cooked meal but there are other ways to get the same feeling. 

I’ll admit right now, I’m that person that puts food in their airplane luggage. I stuff in there some Mac and cheese packets and these lentil packets from Costco. For me, it’s mega comfort food. If I’ve had a super hard day, nothing tastes better than a big ‘ole bowl of Kraft mac and cheese. So I put them in my suitcase for emergencies. Depending on where you’re living, you can probably find some comfort food too, especially if you’re American. Even when I lived in Angola, they had a KFC. —>

It was literally the ONLY American fast food they had for my first two years there. No Starbucks, No McDonalds, just a KFC. So you better believe I frequented KFC probably at least once a month. I never really ate KFC back in Houston but in Angola it was home for me. It tasted and reminded me of home and sometimes I needed that. 

So go ahead and go to the McDonalds and get a Big Mac. You don’t have to tell anyone, just enjoy it and let it bring you back to your childhood for a little while. 

Think About Your Why

I’ve saved the most important for last. Remember why you are there in the first place. Maybe you were seeking adventure. Maybe you were wanting a challenge. Or to feel alive again. Perhaps the money the company offered you was too good to pass up. Go back to your original reason for becoming an expat, when you wanted to experience a new culture - well, you’re getting that culture now and you can’t give up when it gets hard. You chose this harder route in life for a reason. 

One of my biggest reasons for coming on a second expat assignment was financial freedom. I want to be financially independent one day and I knew going overseas for a few more years would help me get closer to that goal. So when I have a hard day, I like to remind myself of that financial freedom goal - that one day Andrew and I won’t require a paycheck to live. And I also like to think of my future family, with a child in tow and how our life will look different if we’re financially free. Financial freedom and my future child are great motivators when I’m having a rough time. 

If your reason for going overseas was the opportunity to experience something new, then get out of your home and go do something. Search online for a class to take. Drive to a neighborhood in your city you haven’t walked through yet. Or pick up a new local food from the grocery store you haven’t tried yet. I know when I’m busy on assignment I’m much happier. When I find myself sitting at home most weekdays with nothing to do, I can go inward too much. Doing something new will take you out of your head and maybe you’ll discover a new passion in the process. 

Get real familiar with your “why” for going overseas because life is bound to get hard, over and over again. If you don’t have a good reason for living overseas, you will move back home quickly. 

I know from personal experience life as an expat can be really hard but next time you find yourself in a funk, try these things and I’m sure you’ll start feeling better and be back to enjoying your new country again in no time.

Ready to move abroad? Be sure to grab my overseas packing checklist with everything you need to pack to make your new country feel like home!